Slacktory

Indiegogo terrible project woman

While checking my Facebook spam, I saw someone’s pitch for an Indiegogo project called “StarLikeMe”. The idea: What if one website did everything all the biggest websites do? What if this site didn’t combine the existing sites, but by replicating the systems that took collective billions of dollars to build and maintain, all for twenty grand?

Do you want to blog (Tumblr); tweet (Twitter); post a message for a friend (Facebook); upload a video (YouTube); store photos (Flicker); edit and share photos (Instagram); have a pin-board (Pinterest)? All of these features and more will be available just as you know them on these other sites. This is a site for all of us to use and enjoy and will provide the latest features of all the major sites.”

What if the pitch video for that website was a few kids, a rapper, and a hot blonde all shouting “Star Like Me, where the stars shine!” And then a lady explains how inconvenient multiple websites are? And it’s all in Eastern European accents, the official accent of sounding shady as fuck?

I guess theoretically combining the features of every major website (plus the iTunes store) might possibly be less than a total clusterfuck, if it were done by one of those major sites, and not by someone standing in her kitchen and misspelling “Flickr”.

And the $100 price for a year’s worth of 100GB cloud storage is reasonable, if you ignore that this project gets your money whether or not they reach their ludicrously inadequate funding goal.

It feels a little mean to mock some stranger for their silly project, except that said project will very definitely take a little bit of money away from gullible people by preying on their pretty-valid privacy fears, and that these people are trying so hard to get noticed that they’ve been emailing Indiegogo and Kickstarter users asking for promotion and advice.

Here, by the way, is the site that’s going to beat YouTube, Facebook, et al.

Let’s delete all the “your crowdsourced project sucks” Tumblrs and just make a new blog about this one project.

  • LOLcopter

    “Hi there! We ripped off MySpace, added nothing new, but made it look like Facebook! But don’t take my word for it! Look at these fake-ass kids!” *thumbs up*

  • artichokehearless

    Leave events? OH! LIVE events. Right.

  • Robert Jones

    Prestige Worldwide!!!

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