Slacktory

paidinpuke

I’m not a huge fan of the “funny puke”. I think the word “puke” is pretty funny, along with the synonyms for puke, including “vomit”, “spew”, “ralph” (WHO IS RALPH?), “hurl”, and by far the funniest iteration: “barf”. But the humor of vomit is in name only. There is no puke humor I can think of in the past ten or so years that was actually amusing. And when someone pukes on screen, I find it so utterly repulsive that no form of falling in said puke, swimming in said puke or even(!) eating said puke could shock value me into a laugh.

That’s why I’m not OK with this recent obsession with funny vomit. This is a real thing that’s happening in our pop culturesphere. I blame Bridesmaids, whose food poisoning vignette (spoilers?) had the ladies projectile vomiting in a wedding dress store. Apparently, it had people “cringing with laughter” — which is an emotion I don’t even believe is possible.

This past week I saw “Pitch Perfect”, a movie about college acapella groups that practically began and ended with puke. I won’t spoil it (hahahahaha) but puke is a powerful player and plot advancer in “Pitch Perfect”. A character might even do snow angels in barf at some point. This movie relies heavily on how funny you think projectile vomit is. (And mash-up covers of David Guetta, but that’s another trend piece.)

In the music world, two of pop’s biggest stars have “accidentally” puked on stage this week. After Justin Bieber’s on-stage vomit was so adorably GIF’d by the Internet’s Finest, I admittedly giggled at the veracity of Bieb’s background dancers — who continued along with their routine, even while their star ralphed.

Justin Bieber Barfs Gif

But after a video yesterday revealed Lady Gaga masking some puke with one of her dancers, I realized that this is officially a Vomit Conspiracy that will undoubtably continue. Need a cheap laugh? Add some puke. Low on GIFs of your 100 Country World Tour? Just spew on stage. If this is where we’re heading, America, soon we’ll all be paid in puke.

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