A while back, Kotaku listed the 12 Best Games for Mac. Although they make some solid suggestions (I’m a little partial to Starcraft myself), there are some glaring omissions. Here are the real top titles.
1. Watching PC Users Struggle with Hot Corners
Arguably the greatest game on a Mac, thanks to the recently released DLC level, “Where the hell did Netflix just go”. After some PC luddite clumsily hits a Hot Corner, it’s a race against time. The goal is to see how long you will try and guide them to get back their windows before snatching away the mouse. You’ve really got to master the sneer of contempt at the end to get into the higher levels, though.
2. Having Zero Shortcut Icons
This game rules. It’s free on all Macs, because of the cloud I’m pretty sure. Since you can’t break the aesthetics of that purple-y space background and the Dock is pretty much impossible to work with, you have to play Having Zero Shortcut Icons. To start it, you just click the little magnifying glass in the top right. Since you don’t remember what anything is named, you just have to type letters until you win!
3. Licenses Lasso
In this game, you test your ability to withstand pain. Basically, every time you’re tempted to buy a PC, you play it by reminding yourself of the $6000 worth of Mac OS software you got for $5 and an empty can of Pepsi with your student discount in college. You can score bonus points if Adobe CS6 costs more than any car you’ve ever owned.
4. Holding Out for Chrome
This is pretty much like Halo’s Firefight mode. Instead of having fun with your friends gunning down Covenant, you try and see how long you can use Safari before you succumb to downloading Chrome. There’s a PC game like it called “Sweet God Please Don’t Make Me Use Internet Explorer.”
5. Interrupting Stories about Computer Viruses
Another multiplayer title, this game is probably the best. To play, you just need to find any friend moaning about their computer having a virus or running slow. Loudly proclaim to everyone that can hear, “Well, MY computer is a Mac, and it doesn’t GET viruses.” You can score extra points if they’re not even talking about something related to a virus and you somehow relate their problem back to the Mac’s superior OS. For a high score, make sure to draw out your “Well,” and push your Warby Parkers back up your nose as you peer down on the PC users.
I kind of wish I had a PC sometimes. That way, I could play “Master Angry Birds On My iPhone While Windows Loads”. I’m sure I missed a few good Mac titles, so just let me know your favorites in the comments. I’ve never tried it, but I’ve heard that “Everyone Look How Creative I Am” is pretty good. Right now I’m still stuck on “Stop Spending All of Your Money on Apple Products”.