Slacktory

Fonzie and his car

All caps: Rule 39 of the internet is “CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.” Corollary: “EVEN WITH CRUISE CONTROL YOU STILL HAVE TO STEER.” Caps lock with periods implies a Will Ferrell sort of “loud talker” voice, funnier than mere shouting.

GIFs: Simple sentiments become complex when expressed through animated GIFs. You are borrowing the “cool” of the GIF. The GIF may be cool just because it’s a GIF:

A video would provide too much context, robbing the man of his power. In this GIF, he is in control, and jimmies are unrustled.

Forum catchphrases: To those in the know, a phrase like “my jimmies are unrustled” or “why can’t I hold all these feels” is a sign that you read the secret, smaller internet. To others, the phrase is magical and new. The best of these phrases remain forever too obscure to become trite as advice memes and rage comics.

Early cuts: When making a video, cut away from every shot a few seconds too early. Workaholics uses early cuts to spice up cold opens. The short film “Sweet” ends on one. 5-Second Films is entirely made of them.

No punctuation: Improves a joke based on feigned ignorance. Lends timelessness to a poetic status update, or authority to a declaration. Also saves one typed character. Pair with lack of capitalization. Popular on Twitter:

Hidden jokes: Webcomics use alt text. Tumblrs use tag jokes. Slacktory hides its jokes by not having readers.

Final list items that have no explanation:

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