Slacktory

tech support lolcats

  • Rebooted it
  • Unplugged it
  • Debugged it
  • Checked the green light
  • Checked the red light
  • Hid it from the Dock
  • Logged out
  • Logged in
  • Googled it
  • Quora’d it
  • Stack Exchanged it
  • Exchanged it at Best Buy
  • Bought a new one
  • Upgraded the old one
  • Used a coupon
  • Used a Groupon
  • Checked for updates
  • Checked for viruses
  • Checked the box
  • Checked the power cord
  • Checked in
  • CHKDSKed

  • Pressed alt-F4
  • Pressed ctrl-alt-del
  • Pressed shift-cmd-esc
  • Pressed the Windows button in the middle of the game
  • Compiled it
  • Compressed it
  • Encoded it
  • Technologic
  • Freed up some space
  • Freed up some memory
  • Installed the extension
  • Uninstalled the extension
  • Updated Flash
  • Updated Silverlight
  • Opened it in Firefox
  • Opened it in IE
  • Opened it in Notepad
  • Stole MS Word
  • Stole Adobe Photoshop
  • Stole seasons 1 and 2 of Game of Thrones
  • Encrypted it
  • Password-protected it
  • Repaired permissions
  • Repaired the CD-ROM drive
  • Upgraded to Blu-Ray
  • Changed the color scheme
  • Selected “Compact”
  • Turned off Messaging
  • Turned off Growl
  • Reversed the Tumblarity
  • Backed it up
  • Backed it up for real
  • Backed it up on Dropbox
  • Recovered Dropbox password
  • Recovered deleted files
  • Hotswapped it
  • Cold booted it
  • Held down “eject”
  • Held down “increase brightness”
  • Bought an amplifier
  • Bought a dock
  • Bought a case on Kickstarter, it’ll come this fall
  • Double-clicked
  • Middle-clicked
  • Hit Scroll Lock
  • Realized I’d hit Scroll Lock once in 2010, or was it twice, is it on or off?
  • Starred everything in iTunes
  • Starred everything in Spotify
  • Starred everything on Twitter
  • Reblogged it
  • Pinned it
  • Bent the actual pin
  • Consulted Clippy
  • Gave in and got a Mac
  • Gave in and got a PC
  • Used a stylus
  • Used my fingers
  • Used voice recognition
  • Asked Siri
  • Asked my nephew
  • Asked the CEO
  • Got it trending
  • Got it Radared
  • Got it upvoted
  • Left a tip
  • Tipped Boing Boing
  • Tipped Gawker
  • Tipped it on its side and drained it
  • Blew the dust out
  • Blew the Geek Squad
  • Cleared the cache
  • Cleaned the screen
  • Liked it
  • “Like”d it
  • Licked it, got shocked
  • Optimized the SEO
  • Optimized the content strategy
  • Optimized the load time
  • Optimized the accessibility
  • Optimized the MySpace angle
  • Opted in
  • Opted out
  • Cropped it out
  • Reduced redeye
  • Tagged it
  • Badged it
  • +K’ed it
  • +1′ed it
  • Built up my karma
  • Built up my whuffie
  • Built up my Minecraft fortress
  • Stat-dumped
  • Memory-dumped
  • Got dumped
  • Felt Lucky
  • Asked Jeeves
  • Thumbed it up
  • Thumb-drived it
  • Craigslisted it
  • Added a referral link
  • Got pinterested
  • Got kottke’d
  • Used the hashtag
  • Used the AOL keyword
  • Got lamp
  • Readied player one
  • Inserted coin
  • TinEyed it
  • BCCed it
  • Bought the domain
  • Reserved the username
  • Used numbers, letters and special characters
  • Guessed
  • Renamed it ” . “
  • DELed COMMAND.SYS
  • Archived it
  • Archive.org’ed it
  • Used WordArt
  • Used KidPix
  • Remote Desktopped
  • Wii Remoted
  • Netflixed it
  • Rotten Tomatoesed it
  • Added it as an IMDb goof
  • Made a ticket
  • Started a channel
  • Started a subreddit
  • Started a meetup
  • Started it up
  • Ran it dry
  • Drained the battery
  • Emptied the drive
  • Unfriended it
  • Hate-blogged it
  • Signed a petition
  • Screamed
  • Smacked it
  • Blended it
  • Buried it
  • Went outside
  • Took a walk
  • Forgot about it
  • http://twitter.com/continuants amanda brennan

    It didn’t work because you forgot to backtrace it

    • http://toomuchnick.com Anonymous

      ARRRRGHHHHH I KNEW I SHOULDA BACKTRACED IT

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